I'm The Person...

That I am! After 32 years of life. Over 12 suicidal attempts. Countless runs to the ER. Handfulls of pills down my throat. After 2 bloody Marys spiced with bleach. A four letter word stamped in my wrist With a burning razor. After trying to bleed my life Through more than 8 cuts in my arms. Stomach cleansing in the bathroom. Thousands of dollars spent in health care. Crying in agony many nights. Theraphy sessions with counselors and psychiatrists. I have come to realize that I am The one person living the "American Dream" and the "American Nightmare" I am the one living it to the fullest. Since the very beginning Since the moment the plane landed in US soil. I've held it, made it mine, left it, forgot about it, Lost it, or just hide it away...but now it consumes me, its tearing me once again...I don't know what to do...